Joy and Pain

GETTING STARTED

Having your parents divorce as you’re going into your teenage years isn’t the easiest thing for a young girl. The experience is based on problems, differences, and choices that your parents have made; but inevitably, the fallout for the kids involved is altogether painful, confusing, and in many ways, alienating.

At the time I didn’t know anyone else in my family or circle of friends who had experienced a divorce. In many ways, I felt alone. I specifically remember a change in my perspective on life. Where I used to depend on my parents to give security, direction, and a foundation, I began to realize that I would need to look somewhere else for my security. After all, my parents were having a hard enough time keeping their own world from crumbling. How could I expect them to know how to protect mine?

READ THE WORD: James 1:2-4 (ESV)

² Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, ³ for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. ⁴ And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

RESPOND TO GOD

A funny thing happened around this same time. Somehow, instead of feeling completely alone and in despair, I felt like someone else was watching over me. I had a great support network of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and friends, but it was hard to lean on them when I always felt like they felt sorry for me. Instead, there was someone greater who gave me peace, direction, and strength. He was Jesus

Around that tumultuous time, I stumbled on a verse at summer camp that I began to cling to. Not only was it a comfort, it was a challenge. It meant that I didn’t have to look at life as a victim of circumstances, but that God was actually using a difficult time to help me develop strength, perseverance, and faith. All I had to do was trust him. It made me want to take an active role in life, sharpening my faith and developing courage

I know I am not alone. With divorce so common in our culture, there are countless young people who experience a similar story. But God is bigger than our circumstances. And his sovereignty is often revealed even when we’re not paying attention.

James doesn’t say “if” you face trials, he says “when” you face trials. It’s just part of life. But, if you use hardship as a time of learning and look to God to teach you and mold you, the result is something we should consider “pure joy.”